07 July, 2010

Biggest A-hole of the World Cup

As you have no doubt noticed, we have a new poll question: Who was the biggest A-hole of the World Cup? Your choices are:

Luis Suarez - This A-hole deliberately used his hands to stop Ghana's winning goal in the final seconds of extra time to deny Ghana, and all of Africa, their first semifinal appearance. After Ghana eliminated the United States in extra time during the round of 16, and they celebrated with their fans, I noticed something interesting. As the players waved their Black Star flag of Ghana, they were not chanting "Ghana! Ghana!" No. They were chanting "Africa! Africa!" along with their African fans. Thanks a lot for screwing over your entire host continent, Suarez!

Jorge Larrionda - the worst referee in the world did not award England's Frank Lampard the tying goal that SHOULD have tied the England/Germany match 2-2 during the round of 16, even though EVERYBODY could see that the ball clearly crossed the line, except for the linesman who was out of position and Larrionda who makes the decisions. Without the tying goal, England fell apart in the second half and lost 4-1. With the tying goal, who knows what might have happened. Unfortunately, we will never know because Jorge Larrionda sucks. All I can say is that the only good thing that came of Uruguay making the semifinal was that Larrionda isn't allowed to work any more games.

Koman Coulibaly - if you live in a cave, you might not know that Koman Coulibaly inexplicably disallowed a winning goal by Maurice Edu of the USA that gave the US a 3-2 win over Slovenia. Instead, Coulibaly refused to ever tell anyone why he disallowed the goal when replays show there is absolutely no indication of any reason for him to do so. To this day, Coulibaly refuses to speak. Reminds me of a referee I know who is, in fact, deaf. Players complain about his calls and he literally can't hear them. They think he is ignoring them. I've been his linesman and it is funny when players scream that they want to substitute, so I hold up my flag in the substitution signal, but he doesn't notice because the action is on the other side of the field at the time. Anyway, Koman Coulibaly is not deaf. He was just IGNORING our team, coaches, and FIFA.

Abdul Kader Keita - Here is video of everything that is wrong with soccer. Kader Keita runs into Kaka, who does not react in any way, and then grabs his head as if he had been punched in the face. The international television feed does a wonderful job catching all this, but French referee Stephane Lannoy is the only one fooled and gives Kaka a second yellow card. Kaka was forced to miss Brazil's match against Portugal, which ended in a 0-0 tie. Good thing Brazil didn't lose that game or Kader Keita would be the most hated man in soccer. As it is, he is just the most embarassing pimple on the face of the beautiful game. Insert your own joke about how the French are the only ones who seem to appreciate terrible acting and pratfalls, while the rest of the world find those things to be immature and in very poor taste.

The Ivory Coast Coward: Player Fakes Face Injury in World Cup Game

Video: Thanks to Matt Cherette of Gawker.TV and of course FIFA and ABC Sports


  1. Follow up on referees: My man Howard Webb of England, my new favorite ref, has been selected by FIFA to officiate the final. Good choice!

  2. As much as I wanted to vote for Kader Keita because I think we saw way too many dives this Cup (better technology?), I still think Coulibaly is the biggest a-hole. I thought these refs were suppose to be the best of the best?


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